As I emerged from the forest I was greeted by bright lights and dazzling signs. An onslaught for the senses! Coming from North Carolina I had just enjoyed a great sunset while taking a leisurely drive and some short hikes in Great Smoky Mountains National Park.

But almost like the flip of a switch, my senses were jerked awake as the forest trees gave way to crowded streets and bright lights. I was almost blinded by signs for casinos, race tracks, aquariums, comedy shows, steak houses, Dollywood, shopping malls, mini-putt courses, theatres, museums and pretty much every other form of family entertainment or amusement that you can imagine. I had made it to Gatlinburg, Tennessee.

To me, it only comes second to the Strip in Las Vegas for optical sensory overload. But, perhaps because I simply wasn’t ready for it, I wasn’t impressed. It had been a long day and all I wanted was to get to my hotel and have a nice sleep. Of course my hotel was at the other end of all of these attractions.

I cruised down the street which was streaming with over-stimulated people, including some jerks running in front of the car and drunken looking guys sitting in lawn chairs at random points along the road. Seemed part frat house, part family fun house. Admittedly the tiredness was quickly fading away as signs for places like the NASCAR Speedpark and Salt and Pepper Museum (with 20,000+ shakers on display!) distracted me.

But I resisted and cruised on past Fannie Farkle’s and the World of Illusions, to where the lights dimmed – beyond the reach of the jerks – or so I thought.

Falling asleep as soon as I got to my room, I woke up late and had no time for breakfast the next morning. It was time to move on…I would have to save the bright lights and excitement of Gatlinburg for another day. Then, staring out my hotel room window I spotted the Jerks. It was a bona fide jerk heaven just across the road from where I was staying. Nothing like I’d ever imagined. Before I knew it I was checked out and headed straight for what must be the jerkiest place in Tennessee.

Hello to The Beef Jerky Outlet and hello to breakfast, lunch and dinner.

An entire outlet store dedicated to the craft of jerking meat. Imagine that? I was greeted by a friendly lady sporting a PETA shirt. You know – People Eating Tasty Animals – so I knew this was my kind of store.

The first thing that caught my eye was the Buffalo Bob’s display of dried meats. The wild boar and buffalo looked ok, but I went for some more unusual choices – ostrich, alligator, antelope and kangaroo. Mmmm, tasty animals!

Then I perused the wall of jerk. Rows and rows of different beef jerky. Some spicy and hot, some sweet and tangy. After a few free samples from PETA shirt lady I chose some of the bootlegger series. Ole Smoky Tennessee Moonshine Jerky! Yep, beef jerky made with real moonshine. I also picked up some hot hunter sausages and smoked elk, buffalo and venison.

What a great find. The selection here was overwhelming. They even had a nice selection of hot sauces and complementary items to go with your jerks. With only six locations in the US so far, here is to hoping that this little company continues to grow beyond the bright lights of the Gatlinburg area.

The jerks kept me company all day as I continued my road trip north towards Pittsburgh. As for the bright lights and big shows in Gatlinburg? I’ll be back for them, especially Ripley’s Penguin Playhouse.

Hope you have a jerk-filled day!